And I almost killed Pearl.
Neither one of the kids ever want to ride with me because in their word's, "Dad's the crazy driver, not you!" It's getting really irritating and worse now that we have "Skulls" {aka, the side-side-side as Fern calls it}. Looking back now, I'm really glad Pearl was the one stuck with me, even if at the time, I could have grounded her for life with her whining and crying about having to ride on the back of the ATV with me. If Cole had been with me instead, I'm not sure what would have happened.
Pearl and I usually drive behind Jeff and the "side-side-side" so we see when the boys decide to drive fast or go off the jumps. There's a few pullouts on the road that you can catch some air on and Pearl begged me to take her on the jumps. Trying to show her that I'm not a complete fuddy-duddy, I took her on the jumps. We were both having a great time - and trust me, I wasn't going very fast - so I gave in to Pearl's pleadings and decided to go one last time.
I don't know what happened, but when we turned to start the jump, I gave it some gas and just hit the turn funny. I doubt we were going faster than 10 miles per hour, if even that. It jarred us both enough that my hands jerked off the handlebars and then I felt Pearl's legs move from right next to my hips up into the air. I heard Pearl scream and instinctively grabbed her as I felt her fly next to the left of me. I grabbed her jacket and was terrified as I watched her dangling on the side of the 4 wheeler, with her hands dragging on the ground right in front of the rear tire. I can still see the image in my mind and it makes me sick to my stomach. She was screaming and I was so afraid I'd tip the machine trying to stop it {it was still moving because I grabbed her with my left hand which is the side where the hand brakes are and I was too panicked to remember to hit the foot brake}. I knew if I dropped her or rolled the four wheeler that the machine would crush her, even with a helmet on.
It was really scary... but I think the adrenline was so intense that I didn't really feel sick about what almost happened until after the ride was over. Sure we puttered along at about 10 miles per hour the rest of the ride and after listening to Pearl tell her Dad that I almost killed her a hundred zillion times - and have to go emergency potty in a bush... that was probably more horrifying to her than a near death experience - that's when it really hit me.
The guilt and nightmares didn't go away for weeks. And on the next ride we took at Bear Lake up our favorite trail, I was in tears when I just freaked out trying to get the machine over some big ruts... ruts that normally I wouldn't even bat an eye at. Jeff yelled at me to stop being a whimp but he just didn't understand the terror going through my brain that I'd kill one of our kids {that time Fern boy}. I couldn't live with that guilt.
I'm really glad we had helmets on. And I'm really glad I got back on and have driven both machines since then. But I won't ever forget the terror I felt. Or Pearl's screams.
{The broskies. I have a feeling we will be getting a 2nd "side-side-side" soon to accommodate both kids who now have a perfectly valid reason for not wanting to ride on the ATV with mom.}
{Go ahead. Laugh. I know what you're thinking these dandelions look like. But seriously, I've never seen dandelions so big before!}
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