Pearl always wants me to drive "straight." It doesn't matter where we go, if you ask for her opinion on how to get there, the answer is always straight. And she knows what that means... no fooling that girl. If you decide to turn she freaks out, especially if we're going home. Everyday on our way home from work she tells me she wants to go straight. And everyday I tell her that I want to go the fast way home which means turning onto the freeway. I don't get it. Going straight takes longer and really isn't that scenic anyway. Lately though I've decided it's easier to give in and take the extra 10 minutes of driving to avoid the banshee screams coming from the back seat. The only problem with this is that eventually we do have to turn. It's the same spot every time and every time Pearl knows it's coming. About a block away from the turn she reminds me that we're going straight. Knowing what's ahead when I do in fact turn, I tried a new tactic last week. I told Pearl that I was the driver so I got to decide. OK so I've lectured her about that before (along with respecting your mom or my personal favorite, that the cops will take me to jail or give me a ticket) but this time she had a comeback. She told me she wanted to drive and proceeded to try and unstrap herself. I told her you have to be 16 to drive and when she turns 16 she can go straight if she wants to. Bad idea on my part. Not only did I have to listen to her banshee screams when we turned but also her insistence that she was in fact 16. I told her over and over again that she was only two but she would have none of it. "No Mom! I'm 16. Let me drive!" Just for fun, since she was already mad anyway, I asked her how old she thought I was. I'm five apparently. Oh and Jeff is 25.And my failed attempt to teach my child something important in this life stuck. The next day at school she told my sister that she was 16. Little does she know how true that is some days.
