The other day I was perusing the papers online and found this blog article, "Chaos in motherhood is normal." Considering that I've been discouraged with my filthy house, dirty laundry, and lack of creativity, the title alone caught my attention. So I took a few minutes to read the article and another article referenced by the author by Jeffrey R. Holland called "Because She is a Mother." Both excellent reads!
The chaos post talks about mothers who realize their perfect ideal of motherhood is far from reality. When I was growing up, I seriously thought I'd be the super mom, cooking gourmet meals and desserts, keeping a spotless house (ok, so I was that before Pearl came along), doing creative crafty projects, sewing, gardening, canning, and teaching reading, writing, and arithmetic to my perfect children. A real super-mom... now a real super-poop. Sometimes it's really hard to admit I'm not the fantasy wife/mother I had once thought I'd be. Most of the time, I'm ok with a messy house and a kid who looks like I didn't comb her hair or give her a bath by the end of the day - I mean who has energy to do that - but then there's always a nagging voice in the back of my head saying I've failed.
When I started this post two days ago, I thought I'd delve into my own opinions on what perfect means, but after starting to read a new book at the prompting of a friend ("The proper care and feeding of husbands" by Dr. Laura - still trying to decide if I want to throw it out the window or keep reading it), am now more confused then ever about who I should be. So, I'll post some pictures of the past day or two of what I think is really the most perfect thing in my life.
New shoes still in pristine condition and actually on... perfect.
Obviously I am perfect at teaching Pearl manners... obviously.
Making the perfect birthday card for your favorite Godparent, David.
Perfect concentration!
Perfect way to spoil your dinner... and make your husband happy.
The perfect black heels. Pearl seriously walks better in them than I can! Not to mention jumping, running, and climbing the stairs.
I promise this is NOT the perfect kiss! If you look ever so closely, you'll see what Pearl considers to be one of the most funny things to do to her dad - steal the grass he is sucking on. The problem with this is that she then proceeds to stuff her mouth full of grass, chomps on it for a few minutes, then spits it out everywhere.
The perfect throw. Next up, rubbing grass in your Dad's hair.
4 comments:
There is no such thing as a perfect mom. In the end, the dishes, craft projects, clean house, gourmet meals, etc. will NEVER matter. The only thing that matters is people and how we love/serve them. And you are doing a GREAT job with your family. You are awesome! Remember, we aren't required to run faster than we have the strength to do.
I know those things really don't matter, but it is SO hard to let go of the ideals...especially when I THINK there ARE women who are the perfect everything out there. I'm seriously struggling with that probably daily. It seems sometimes I am so mediocre in EVERYTHING! Uggh. Thanks for your post, though. I'll have to read that talk. Sometimes I need a boost about what I am accomplishing, etc. Thanks for your thoughts!!!
I honestly think the perfect mom is unrealistic and impossible. You do a great job with Pearl. Don't be so hard on yourself. In the long run the messy house and dirty laundry don't matter. Plus...keeping a house clean and the piles of laundry won't slow down until you're old and the kids have moved out. That's not something to look forward to. So many who have reached that stage have told me to enjoy it while it lasts. What matters is your family is happy and striving to return to our Father in Heaven. Just take one day, one pile of laundry, one mess, one memorable moment with your family, at a time. When you have time, do a little more. But like was mentioned by someone else...don't run faster than you have strength!
Perfection comes in accepting the stage of life you are in. There is a time and season for all things. I felt horrible I couldn't volunteer in Jake's class last year, but it just would NOT work for us. This year, it works, so yea for me. Perfection also is evident when you see the love you have for your children and that they have for you. It makes everything else fade away, even throw up, poop, homework that isn't done, a clean house and all else. This is why God gave us kids, to remind us of His version of perfection: The Eternal Family.
You are as perfect as you need to be for Pearl!
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